It's not okay

I am pissed off, upset, and concerned for a friend, but for all young women who may experience what we have been through.
I've thought this before. Maybe it has been written about, but I haven't seen it.
Rape is non-consensual sex.
A woman (or man) should not blame themselves when they are unable to say no. And when I say this I mean that are in a state of mind, which yes might be inebriated, and/or afraid to fight back and say no.
Don't blame yourselves. Stop. Even if he (she) thinks it was consensual, it's not. You didn't consent to the act.
But I believe many of us didn't call it rape and many young girls don't.
They see this force of power as a someone liking them, paying attention to them.
But it's not good attention. If they respect you, they would not violate you.
Women, teens and adults, face this. I know they do.
You can't excuse his(her) behavior because you were drunk. That's blaming the victim and not making the abuser take responsibility for their actions. I don't care what the abuser thinks. If you don't remember it, how can it have been consensual?
We need to mentor young girls. We need to help them gain self-esteem. We need to challenge a society that blames the victim for being drunk. We need to challenge society's norms that promote a rape culture and power.
No it's not okay. Please tell me you believe this dear friend. I am hurting for you.
I wish I would have defined the times it happened to me as what they were at the time. Instead it f*** ed with my head, my future relationships, and security with myself.
It's not okay.